Getting lost in your relationship is not a failure. Being true to yourself and being close to those you love is just harder than you ever imagined it would be. You lose your way by trying to do more or less of something to relieve the pressure in the relationship instead of resolving the underlying conflict that is causing the pressure.

In this therapy, partners receive straightforward, compassionate guidance to identify the unresolved, underlying issues that keep them in conflict in the marriage. Significant new learning supports partners to be true to themselves, to be close to their mates, and to develop a sense of belongingness. Honesty, vulnerability, integrity, respect, and transparency guide the therapy and discussions.

With heartfelt directness and kindness, Don Elium, MA MFT, guides couples to face the challenges to grow that all marriages demand.  This powerful marriage counseling reveals the lessons that marriage is trying to teach each participant about true intimacy, caring for self and other, letting go of suffering, and practicing a love that stays solid in the midst of conflict.  

The stages of therapy follow this wonderful poem:

 

There’s A Hole In My Sidewalk (Book) By Portia Nelson

Autobiography In Five Short Chapters (Poem)

 

Chapter One

I walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I fall in.

I am lost . . . I am helpless.

It isn’t my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.

 

Chapter Two

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend I don’t see it.

I fall in again.

I can’t believe I am in this same place.

But it isn’t my fault.

It still takes a long time to get out.

 

Chapter Three

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there.

I still fall in . . . it’s a habit . . . but,

My eyes are open.

I know where I am.

It is my fault.

I get out immediately.

 

Chapter Four

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.

 

Chapter Five

I walk down another street.

************

Something significantly new awaits you.

I hope I have the privilege to work with you soon.

Sincerely,

Don

Don Elium, MA MFT

 

 

 

 

 

 

Member California Association of Marriage & Family Therapist

Accredited as a provider of Continuing Education by the

Board of Behavioral Sciences, State of California, Approval No. PCE 3717

Marriage & Family Therapist License # # MFC28381

 

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